This One Time, I Had a Baby

And it was a VBAC

And it was medication-free

And it burned like the fire of a thousand firey suns

And I pooped

And it lasted 4.5 hours.  That's right. 4.5 hours. 

My water broke at 7pm on Friday the 13th in a giant splash heard round the world.  All over my iphone (which meant new iphone).  And then this little baby was born 4.5 hours later in the hospital.  It was kind of a rush job where we got to the hospital barely an hour before and I had to sign all the hospitally paperwork afterwards because, hello- no time when a baby is shooting out of your body.

And we had a girl. Her name is Bridget. 

I think we'll keep her.

Oh Hai. I'm Bridget. I wait for nobody.

Things. Are. Happening!

Doorway moved- Check
Window installed- Check
Nasty 1960 windows closed- Check
Closet framed- Check
Bathroom framed- Check
Electrical done- Check
Electrical inspection- Check
Plumbing roughed in- Check
Framing & Plumbing inspections scheduled- Check
Drywaller scheduled for tomorrow-Check
Toddler naked in her crib this morning- Check
Cervix changes- Check. 

And no, I will not post a picture of my my mucous plug. No matter how nicely you ask.

Happy Friday the 13th.

I'm Going to Matrix My Way Through This

These days we're cutting things a little close.

Like razor close. Or face-talker close.  Or get out of my bubble you Face-Talker close.

Or watch me dodge these bullets like Neo in the Matrix close.

Our hard-wood floors and their instillation are the most invasive part of our upstairs renovation.  We have to move ALL of our upstairs furniture to the downstairs where we will proceed to camp out like an episode of Hoarders while they put them in. 

I'm okay with that. Right now we have this god-awful green carpet that I swore was circa 1986 until Brendan found a sticker during demo that showed it was installed in 2006.  2006!!!! Apparently bad taste never goes out of style.

The only problem? Worst case scenario- The floors aren't getting delivered until April 16.  Some kind of truck delay yadda yadda nonsense. Here's a little timeline action for you:

Monday, April 16: Floors delivered to warehouse

Tuesday, April 17: Floors delivered to our house

Wed, Thurs, Friday, April 18-20:  Floors installed while we live like refugees amongst our belongings in the living room.

Saturday, April 21: Move furniture back to the upstairs

What did I miss?  Oh yeah, my due date is April 20. So, we've got to insert some pregnant matrix-like moves to keep this baby in my uterus until at least Saturday or Sunday.  But that's cool. I've got moves like Mick Jagger, y'all.

Besides, who wants to have a baby on 4/20? That's like the crappiest date ever.